Siblings rivalry

In the name of God, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.


Maksu: Kak Ayu tau tak, muka Kak Lala tak macam kita semua. Maksudnya Kak Lala bukan anak mama.

Ummi: Erk! Adik, muka adik lagi lain dari kitorang. Adik la bukan anak mama. Tau dak waktu kecik-kecik dulu kitorang amik adik dari orang. Adik tak ingat sebab waktu tu adik kecik lagi.

...

I guess there are a lot of people have been in this situation when someone/their siblings "tease" them by saying they are not their parents' child. Conflict between siblings is very common and in fact some siblings even fight after entering adulthood. However, it can be a big problem sometimes.

It is very amazing how my mom raised us 6 girls because we don't really have fight with each other and we really listen to Mom and Dad. We are also lucky that our parents never hit us and rarely raise their voice towards us unless we have a very big fight. Honestly, I'm so scared if someone is angry at me because I'm not use to it. So here, I just want to emphasize the point that we don't need to spank or hit our children in order to educate them.

Although we don't have fight, I did bully my little sisters when we were young or maybe until now. (This isn't very nice of me) I remember there's this one time your Aunt Mas, she scribbled your Aunt Mimi's doll. She put a very big dot on its forehead with a marker(just like kum-kum, the red dot on Indian women's foreheads) and colored the doll's eyes. Your Aunt Mimi cried heavily after she found out  and I saw her singing to her doll(maybe to console it). I laughed at her; seeing what happened and yes that's really mean. Honestly, I feel guilty until now for not taking her seriously. I bought her presents when I grew up to make her happy and to get over my guilt. But, that feeling doesn't really fade away.

Maksu & Aunty Mimi

So kids, I hope you won't have a fight with your siblings or anyone. Once you did bad thing, sometimes you will carry that feeling of guilty for a long time. And by hurting people, it doesn't make you feel better. Apologize if you started a fight; just say sorry! It is reported in a Hadith:

"Whoever is offered an apology from a fellow Muslim should accept it unless he knows that the person apologizing is being dishonest"
(Mishkat al Tabrizi)

So, I want to say sorry to you kids for my mistakes and I also want to say sorry to "someone" that I may have been misunderstood. Maybe my Bahasa is not good enough that I don't get what you are trying to say and I know you  didn't mean to hurt me. And I'm sorry if I made you feel bad by writing something sad. I'm not good in expressing my feelings, so I will write things when I feel sad to overcome that feeling but that doesn't mean I'm angry. You are my friend anyway, how could I be angry at my friend?.

Ok. that's all. Luv ya.

قَالَا رَبَّنَا ظَلَمْنَآ أَنفُسَنَا وَإِن لَّمْ تَغْفِرْ لَنَا وَتَرْحَمْنَا لَنَكُونَنَّ مِنَ ٱلْخَٰسِرِينَ

They said, "Our Lord, we have wronged ourselves, and if You do not forgive us and have mercy upon us, we will surely be among the losers."

[Surah Al-A'raf:7:23]

How to say sorry:

1. Accept that what you did is wrong.

2. Ask for Allah's forgiveness

3. Replace bad deeds with good deeds

4. Make intention not repeat the mistake again

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